hopes and dreams, | part ten chapters 401 to 435

Beckie lay in bed and looked at the photo she had of her and Xabi in happy days. She heard a knock on the door. "Come in," she whispered as she wiped away the tears. "Hey senorita," Xabi said as he sat down on the bed, "whats wrong? Why are you crying?" Beckie looked at him and shook her head. "Go away Xabi," Beckie said as she turned her head away from him.

Steven came into Pennys room and saw Tiegan on Nando's back playing horsey. "Giddy up Nando, Giddy up," she giggled laughing as she kissed his head. "Nnnnnnnnnnnnneigh," Nando said as he crawled around the room laughing. "What you playing sweetheart?" Steven said as he crouched beside her. Tiegan got of Nando's back and walked towards the door. "I am not talking to you Steven, you hurt us, and I hate you, you hurt mummy and angel, and Jasmine, Nando and Frank are my dad now, not you, so fuck off."

"Beckie, whats wrong talk to me, please," Xabi said as he lifted her chin up so their eyes met. "Don't touch me," Beckie whispered as inside she melted at his touch. "What is wrong?" Xabi is looked at her lovingly. "Why did you do it? Look at us here, I loved you Xabi, look at us, we were so happy, and then you had to shag that Spanish slut and ruin it all, what was it? I wasn't good enough for you, is that it?" Beckie asked getting angry. "No it wasn't like that senorita," Xabi said as he turned away. "Then what, FUCKING TELL ME," Beckie screamed at him crying.

Steven looked at the others obviously upset. "Mate she doesn't mean it," John said as he picked up Jack who was crying. "Oh you don't know my daughter JT, she says things and she means it," Stevie said as he took Pennys hand. "Mate she's upset, come on," Wayne said as he put Coleen on his lap. "And she has every right to be upset," Coleen said as she rolled her eyes. "Coleen, please," Wayne said as he kissed her cheek. "No it's OK Wayne she's right, you think I don't wish I wasn't in this hospital bed, that it wasnt Angel that I just had to see fight to breathe on her own, you think I don't wish it was me that was going to be in that little white coffin in a few days time," Steven said as he started to cry. Rio hugged him. "Hey man, its OK, everything will be alright," Rio said as he hugged him tightly.

"I missed Spain alright," Xabi said suddenly. "Pardon?" Beckie asked as she looked at him seriously. "I missed Spain, I missed the language, the people, the food, the weather," Xabi said as he looked at her tears in his eyes. "Thats why? That is fucking pathetic Xabi, fucking pathetic," Beckie said as she screamed at him. "I know senorita, I fucking know alright," Xabi said as he sighed. Suddenly Beckie screamed out in pain.

Scott pushed Jackie into Pennys room and looked as Rio hugged Stevie as he cried. "Oh my god, penny isnt dead is she?" Jackie asked as tears welled up in her eyes. "No of course she isn't," Scott said as he hugged her, "is she?" Steven shook his head. "No she isn't dead, and Angel is breathing on her own now," Steven said as he managed a small smile. "That's brilliant mate," Jamie said as he patted him on the back. "Yeah it is, my little angel," Steven said as he sighed.

"Senorita, what is wrong?" Xabi asked worriedly. "My back its my back," Beckie said as she winced in pain. "Let me have a look at it," Xabi said worriedly as he lifted her top up gently. Beckie shivered with the sensation. "Where abouts does it hurt?" Xabi asked as he touched her back gently. "OUCH!" Beckie screamed in pain. "Does that hurt?" Xabi said as he kissed her back gently. "Xabi..." Beckie whispered as she groaned. "Do you want me to stop?" Xabi said as he kissed up and down her back. Beckie groaned in reply. She turned around and looked in his eyes and lent in and kissed him on the lips gently. Xabi kissed her back slowly. "Are you sure?" Xabi asked as he stroked her cheek. Beckie nodded as she snogged him passionatly and rolled on top of him.

Regrets?

Beckie groaned as Xabi started to kiss down her neck. "Are you sure you want this?" Xabi asked as he took his top off to reveal his bruised stomach where Micah had punched and kicked him. Beckie gasped as she saw it. She kissed his bruise gently. Xabi groaned half in pain and half in pleasure of the sensation of it.

Scott looked at Jackie as he rubbed her bump gently. "Stevie is a mess," Scott said as he laid next to her. "Yeah I know, I did kind of feel sorry for him, But he bought it on him self Scott, you know Tiegan isn't a pushover, she is a bright five year old, who is a mummy's girl," Jackie said seriously, "and twice now when my mate has been pregnant he let her down." "I know Jacks, but its done now, I dont want you worrying, not in your condition," Scott said as he kissed her head, "now you go to sleep OK? You and peanut need to rest."

Steven stormed into Alex's room and looked at her as she got treated for her head wound. "You happy now?" Steven asked as he looked at her. "What do you mean?" Alex asked as she looked at him confused. "You fucking killed my daughter," Steven said as he looked at her full of anger, "Because of you I have to bury my little girl, I have to watch my wife have machines breathe for her, I have to see my son have tubes and wires all around him, I have had to witness the doctors switch Angels' machines off, my other daughter hates me so much she would rather have Frank Lampard as a dad, do you know what that feels like that?" Steven asked as the anger pumped through his veins.

Xabi entered her slowly and very slowly began to make love to her. As he came inside her, Xabi groaned as he snogged her. "I need to sleep now Xabi," Beckie said as she looked at him confused. "OK Senorita," Xabi said as he put his arm around her and kissed her shoulder. "Xabi if you hurt me again I will kill you," Beckie said seriously, "and we are taking it slowly, so no telling people." Xabi nodded as he shut his eyes and kissed her hand slowly. Beckie looked up at the ceiling. "Please tell me I am doing the right thing," she whispered as she shut her eyes.

Tiegan lay down next to Frank as he held her. "Do you love my mummy?" Tiegan asked him suddenly. "Yeah, Yeah I do," Frank whispered as he stroked her hair. "Do you want her to be your girlfriend?" Tiegan asked as she sighed. "Tiegan its complicated, she loves your dad," Frank said as he sighed, "and she don't love me, not like that, all that I do know is that I am always going to be here for you and your brother and sisters, OK." Frank said as he kissed her forhead.

"You think thats my fault?" Alex asked as she looked at him seriously. "Yeah, you run my wife's car off the road, because you fucking couldn't take the fact she is 100% better than you, I hate you Alex, I wish i had never ever laid eyes on you, trust me, you will pay for this accident Alex, you will, don't you even think about coming near my family again you got that?" Steven asked as he grabbed her hair hard and pulled it. "Steven, stop please, your hurting me," Alex said as she cried out in pain. "You think thats pain? Fancy having a car hurtle towards you, a little baby having a heart attack and dying on an opertating table, my wife having her back smashed to pieces, thats pain," Steven said as he whispered angrily in her ears. "Stevie you love me," Alex said whispering as Stevie pulled her head back even harder. "No I don't love you, the person I love is fighting for her life, the people i love are all fighting for their life, you, I dont love, never have done, never well, so why dont you and your Portugese wanker of a boyfriend, get out of my site before I do something I regret," Steven said as he let go off her banging her head back hard and stormed out angrily.

My angel
Steven woke up next to Penny rubbing his eyes, he kissed her hand. “Come on Penny, wake up please, for me,” Steven said as he looked at her, “Even if it’s just to hit me please Penny.” Steven wiped his eyes as Wayne walked in and sat down. “Stevie she will be OK, she will be,” Wayne said as he picked up Jade and kissed her. Stevie stared at Jade tears filling his eyes. “Mate?” Wayne asked looking at him concerned. “Do you mind leaving me on my own for a bit?” Steven asked as he sighed.
Xabi woke up to find the space next to him empty. He yawned and got up and walked around sighing in pain when he yawned. “Senorita?” he asked as he staggered out of the room. “In here,” Beckie called out as she stood by Junior’s cot. “Isn’t he just gorgeous,” Xabi said as he kissed her cheek and wrapped his arms around him. “Yeah he is Xabi,” Beckie said as she sighed, “Shall we get ready; I need to speak to Micah.” Xabi nodded. “I need to speak to Stevie about Tiegan too,” Xabi said sighing. “What about?” Beckie asked as she tusned to look at him.
Jackie sat next to Angel as Scott stood outside with the others talking about what to do about the funeral and how to mention it to Stevie. “Maybe we should leave the lads to talk about the sad story eh Angel, Auntie Jackie will start crying,” Jackie said as she kissed Angel’s head. Scott walked in and smiled at Jackie. “Stevie won’t talk to anyone at the moment, Wayne wants to talk to him about the funeral,” Scott said sighing as he put his arms around Jackie. “It must be hard for him, I don’t think I will be able to cope Scott when I see that little coffin,” Jackie said as she began to break down in tears. “Hey Jackie, it will be ok I will be here,” Scott said as he kissed her cheek.
Steven sat down opposite Jamie. Jamie looked at him. “Stevie about the funeral,” Jamie said as he looked at his best mate. “No its OK Jamie,” Steven said as he turned away and looked at Jade in her car seat. “Mate, its next week the funeral on Christmas Eve is that OK with you?” Jamie asked as he tried again. “Yeah,” Stevie said tears in his eyes, “don’t bother me anyway, I won’t be going.” Jamie looked at him shocked. “What do you mean you won’t be going?” he asked amazed. “I am not going ok, so just leave it,” Stevie said as he stood up and walked towards the door.
Beckie sat in the car next to Xabi on the way to the hospital. “Why do you need to talk to Stevie about Tiegan?” Beckie asked as she looked at him. “Just about why she isn’t allowing him to see her, it’s not right Beckie,” Xabi said as he drove off. “Xabi it’s not our place ok? The others don’t like me, they blame me for this,” Beckie said as she looked at Xabi. “No they don’t,” Xabi said as he looked at her seriously, “why would they blame you?”
“He isn’t going,” Jamie said as he looked at Wayne. “What do you mean he isn’t going? He has to go, it is his daughter,” Wayne said confused. “I don’t know, he just said he isn’t going,” Jamie said shrugging. “He will be going,” Wayne said as he walked out the room seriously. Coleen walked in and handed Jackie a coffee. “What’s wrong with Wayne? Nothing has happened has it?” Coleen asked worriedly. “No, Stevie isn’t going to the funeral,” Jackie said as she looked at her tears in her eyes.
“But she is his daughter,” Jackie exclaimed shocked. “Maybe it’s just too hard for him,” Coleen said shrugging her shoulders as she picked up Jade, “I don’t know what I would do if this happened to Jade.” Jackie hugged her. “Hey this won’t happen to Jade Coleen, it won’t!” Jackie said seriously. “Daddy,” Angel whispered as she chocked on the tubes down her throats. “Oh my god,” Jackie said as she ran to her. “I’ll go and get Stevie,” Coleen said as she ran out carrying Jade.
“Because to them I came between Stevie and Penny,” Beckie said as she looked down sadly. “No you didn’t Beckie,” Xabi said seriously, “You didn’t want Stevie did you?” Beckie looked at him and shook her head. “No Xabi, can we just change the subject, I just want to see Micah and go home ok?” Beckie asked as she looked at him seriously. Xabi nodded.
“Steven,” Coleen shouted out as he went to walk out of the hospital. “What?” he asked as he turned around. “Angel’s awake,” Coleen said as she looked at him smiling. Steven looked at her and ran to her and kissed her on the lips. Coleen looked at Stevie shocked. “Sorry,” he whispered as he ran off towards Angel’s room. “Angel, its OK daddy is here,” Stevie said as he ran to her and hugged her tightly, “daddy is here and I am never ever letting you out of my sight.” A tear rolled down his cheek as he held her tightly.

Not daddy

Steven came out of the room when Angel finally fell asleep he saw Beckie enter and looked at her. Xabi looked at Stevie and then at Beckie and sighed. “Don’t get jealous,” he whispered to himself. “She is awake,” Stevie said as he looked at Xabi and Beckie smiling. “Who Penny?” Xabi asked smiling. “No Angel, my little Angel is awake,” Steven said as he smiled at them. “Oh that’s great Stevie,” Beckie said as she hugged him. “Is Tiegan awake?” Xabi asked as he looked at Stevie.
Frank held Penny's hand and stroked it gently. "Frank don't do that," John said as he sat down next to Frank and looked at him. "Do what?" Frank asked confused. "Stroke her hand," John said seriously, "she is married to Steven and you have Elen." Frank looked at John seriously. "Stevie doesn't deserve her, he cheats, he hurts her, what right does he have to her and that baby over their?" Frank asked seriously. "More rights than you mate," John said seriously. "Yeah just like my rights to Elen's baby, I aint the dad mate, Xabi is, I have no rights, I dont love her anymore mate, I love Penny," Frank whispered as he kissed Penny's cheek gently.

"She is alright," Steven said as he looked at Xabi, "why do you ask?" Xabi looked at him and smiled. "Is she letting you see her?" Xabi said as he looked at his mate concerned. Steven shook his head. "Only Nando and Frank," Steven said sadly. "Come on lets go and see her," Xabi said as he looked at Stevie. "She won't see me," Steven said as she looked through the door and saw Nando reading Tiegan a story as she drank her milk and he fed her her tea.

Beckie sighed as she sat next to Jamie. "Whats that sigh for missy?" Jamie asked as he looked at her. "Why is my life such a mess? Why is it everything I touch turns to a big mess? I slept with Xabi last night," Beckie said as she looked at him. Jamie looked at her confused. "You two back together?" Jamie asked then hopefully. "No... Yes... I don't know Jamie," Beckie said as she looked at him, "What about Micah? What about Elen and the baby? What about myself and my dignity?" Jamie looked at him. "You have to forgive and forget and move on for yourself and your kids," Jamie said seriously. "I can't do that Jamie, I am not Penny I won't just sit around and be cheated on, thats why I am moving to Australia." Jamie looked at Beckie. "What about Xabi?" he exclaimed.

George started to cry and Frank picked him up gently and kissed him. "Your gorgeous just like your mummy," Frank whispered as he rubbed his cheek being careful of the wires. "I think you should put him down," Rio said as he walked in. "He was crying," Frank said defensively. "Yeah and his dad can deal with it," Wayne said as he took George off him. "Yeah, where is he Wayne? Where is he?" Frank asked as he took George off him again. "He isn't a toy you know," Scott said as he looked at them, "he is a little boy whose mum might die and his dad is struggling to cope." Scott took George and put him on his shoulder. "shhhh little one, its OK daddy will be back soon i promise," Scott whispered as he kissed his head.

Xabi walked in to Tiegans room. "Hey Tiegan can we come in?" Xabi asked as he walked in and kissed her gently. "You can but Daddy can go," Tiegan said as she kissed Nando. "Nando can you leave us for a sec," Xabi said in Spanish, "I am going to sort this out." Fernando nodded as he stood up. "Tiegan i am just going to see Lucy ok?," Fernando said as he kissed her. "Don't leave me Uncle Nando not with him," tiegan said crying. "shhhh its OK, your daddy won't hurt you no more I promise, i love you Tiegan be a big brave girl for your mummy ok?" tiegan nodded as she kissed him. Xabi looked at Tiegan and hugged her. "Your daddy loves you, dont you Stevie?" Xabi asked as he looked at Stevie.